Saturday, March 23, 2013

DVD Movie Review - Killer Joe


After watching "Killer Joe" I didn't know whether to be aroused, appalled, or ashamed.  I guess in a perfect world, you could be all three...but that's just sick.  Seriously, the film gives a whole new added benefit for the fried chicken leg—and it has nothing to do with consumption.  So, what kind of movie is Killer Joe?  It's the kind of movie that you don't openly express that you've actually seen, but if you hear someone talking about it, you have to jump into the conversation out of sheer curiosity.  It borders on raunchy, sleazy, humorous, erotic, ridiculous and down-right wrong.

"You ever seen symbols like that before?  Apparently, they're called 'words'." 

WARNING! SPOILERS: Full scenes are discussed below, because...they just had to be, sorry.  
                                       Endings and plot spoilers are withheld.  Read on at your own risk.

STORY:
Whacked-out Chris Smith (Emile Hirsch) owes some powerful men six grand.  Instead of working for it, he decides the best way to obtain the money, is to have his mother killed and use the life insurance policy to pay off his debts.  Enter…Killer Joe Cooper (Matthew McConaughey) who will do the deed for payment.  Since Chris doesn't have the money up front, he offers up his innocent, naive sister Dottie (Juno Temple) as a retainer.  Bat-sh*t crazy, trailer-park trash stupidity ensues.

Hey, at least he's not texting too.

THOUGHTS:
I don't even know where to begin. So...let’s start at the opening:

The opening scene has Chris banging on a trailer door in the middle of the night.  After a few minutes, his step-mother answers in just a t-shirt giving Chris and the audience a face-full-of-bush.  The upside?  It's Gina Gershon's bush.  The downside?  It's more unkempt than the Amazon.  I wouldn't be surprised that if and when she does trim the hedges, they find a few new species of mammal in there.  Chris does ask her what she's doing answering the door like that, to which she simply replies: "Well, I didn't know who it was."  Wow—and if you think that's the line they won't cross, you'd be wrong.  Dead wrong.  Once the face-full-of-bush line is laid on the concrete, the film pulls out a jackhammer and obliterates it until there's nothing left, but bits and pieces of good morals.

Gina Gershon called, she wants her bush trimmers back.

The Smiths are the epitome of sleaze: there’s Chris, the degenerate scumbag that loves his little sister, but sees nothing wrong with killing his mother.
Ansel Smith (Thomas Haden Church), Chris' simple father, who goes along with anything, just make sure he has a beer in the fridge and a monster truck rally on the TV.
Sharla Smith (Gina Gershon), Chris' step-mother/town whore, who also sees nothing wrong with offing the mother, as long as she gets 1/4 of the insurance money.
Dottie Smith (Juno Temple) who plays naive, but seems to know more of what's going on than most of these idiots.  Oh, and she really likes Kung-Fu.
Killer Joe (McConaughey) who isn't officially part of the Smiths, but would like to be, and he's also a police detective/hit man.

"Crap.  I forgot how to walk again."

The hardest part of the film is rooting for someone.  You really don't know whose side to take here.  The closest you can come is the younger sister Dottie, but even she makes some questionable decisions.  So, good luck.

ACTING:
Emile Hirsch is the only weak link in the movie.  He seems to be having a fun time with the character, but emotionally his acting isn't there.  But, if Emile's sloppy acting weighs down the film, then it's lifted right back up by everyone else.  Church, Gershon, Temple, and especially McConaughey are excellent in all the roles.  As much as some of the scenes make your skin crawl between Temple and McConaughey, they both put every ounce of effort into even the most subtle parts.

"Oh, whisper it again...slowly."  K...F...C...

GOOFY/BIZARRE SCENES:
There are some scenes in this movie that once you see them, they'll become a stain on the wall of your brain.  Not bleach or even acid will rinse these moving pictures from your mind.  There are plenty of other over the top shenanigans going on, but these two scenes...well, read below:

NAKED KUNG FU:
Chris falls asleep on the sofa and thinks he's dreaming when his sister comes out in the middle of the night, and decides to Kung-Fu kick the air, bare-ass naked.  And absolutely nothing is held back: Full-female frontals are a dime-a-dozen in this movie, so expect to see everything.  The scene makes no sense whatsoever, has nothing to do with plot, but made me crack up laughing.  The expression Temple has on her face while doing the kick is priceless, and then she simply turns around and stomps away.  (Hilarious to a very sick mind)

"I wanna watch Kung-Fu Panda!  Kung-Fu Panda!  I don't like the new Karate Kid."

CHICKEN LEG FELLATIO:
The honor of this scene goes to Gina Gershon.  She just received a nose crushing fist to the face, turning her entire facade purple with blood dripping everywhere.  Then she gets on her knees and well...you know.  I'm still trying to wrap my head around the kind of person who thinks up a scene like this one.  Not to mention McConaughey's actions while it's taking place.  (Excuse me a second—I have to go wash out my eyeballs and then head to Confession.)  The one question I have is: What the hell was Gershon thinking while reading the script?  Did she read the scene and think, "Man, this is Oscar material right here."  Or did they spring this crap on her?  Either way, she deserves some kind of award, and if there's none to give, then they need to create one...period.

"Me and you are going to do such naughty things together."

If you’re at all wondering whether this film is, or is not intended for small children—what the hell have you been reading?  The frigging answer seems clear to me.  Now, if you’re are still wondering, then go ahead and check yourself into a mental institution, because something is wrong and it's going to take all of the world’s doctors to figure that crap out.

"If it makes you feel any better.  I'd do the scene if they asked me...but they're not asking me.  You see?"

Killer Joe is a film that once seen, can't be unseen.  The actions, dialogue, and filth will attach itself to your mind until you die.  Even then, it might pass itself off to your children.  You will be disgusted, appalled, but also laughing, and possibly aroused if a bucket of chicken is your thing.  Either way, Killer Joe is a film that shouldn't be missed if you like controversial scenes and outlandish plots.

3 out of 5 stars (minus 1 star for helping me realize I have a sick mind and another for the "slightly" over-the-top plot) 

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