Coasting
on fumes from The Chronicles of Riddick, 2013's Riddick tries to get back to
the roots of Pitch Black, by slashing the budget down to a third, reducing the
scope, slimming the cast, and telling a tale almost exactly like the original.
STORY:
Richard
B. Riddick is left to die on a planet only referred to as "Not
Furya." With a sprained ankle, a
huge storm, and local creatures looking to tear his flesh off, he assembles a
plan: send out a distress signal and wait to see who turns up. One arriving ship holds a team with a tie to
his past, and the other, holds men looking to chop his head off. Will Riddick be able to overcome both
mercenary teams, or will this be the end to everyone's favorite Furyan? Poisons, funky animals, silliness from
Sackhoff, broken noses, and decapitations ensue.
"Alright, all normal human beings move to the left. Mr. Bautista, you move further to the
right to balance out the photo. Perfect!"
THOUGHTS:
Riddick's
cult likability has recessed in the past years following Chronicles, but with
Pitch Black as an anchor, and the video game: Escape from Butcher Bay, the
character has managed to stay alive and even churn out a third movie. If for some reason you haven't seen either of
the previous films in the series, then there is no need for you to see the
third. Fans of Pitch Black will
appreciate the throwbacks to the original, and may even be tossed a few "Easter eggs" along the way.
The
movie starts out slow as Diesel portrays a man trying to survive on his own in
a wilderness that's likely to kill any normal human being. A brief five minute flashback of the
Necromongers (basically Karl Urban as an
intergalactic cab driver) is tossed in, and then the plot moves forward,
absolutely forgetting the whole Necromonger incident. So if you tuned in to see a continuation of
that story (Riddick as king Necromonger)
than you might as well write it yourself, because there's nothing here. This film is basically a one-shot,
self-contained story. Something you'd
see in comic books. But that doesn't
matter, because you're really here to gaze upon the Diesel: his charms, his
dashing good looks, and even his fatherly traits—which come into play after he
acquires a new CG pet.
Due to the restricted budget, the producers ripped out the Xenomorph's mini-mouth
and added an Abe Lincoln chin.
Then
the Calvary shows up in the form of two ships full of mercenaries. One happens to be a team, complete with
matching outfits, led by the Boss (Matt Nable) and second in command, Dahl
(Katee Sackhoff). The other team is led
by Santana (Jordi Molla) and can be considered the movie's misfits. Will you need to remember everyone's name and
their team? Nope. They're just fodder for Riddick to slice
through as the movie progresses. Still
the animosity from the opposing mercenary teams can be quite hilarious to watch
at times.
The
film keeps the story line simple and the dialogue even simpler. If you're into grungy Sci-Fi films with
humorous flair, then this will be your movie.
It carries almost the same plot as the original Pitch Black, but several
story elements have been elevated. So
how do you outdo the first film? Well, by increasing the number of mercenaries
for one. Take the amount of one ship, up
to two, and then introduce not one, but two creatures to the mix. And—BAM—a whole new movie.
"Okay, now...everyone look over here and stare."
"What's my line again?"
"We've already told you, Katee, you don't have a line. Just try and look intimidating or something."
ACTING:
The
mercenaries all fit their respected roles.
Jordi Molla (Santana) plays the basic dick-bag of the film, only
becoming slimier as the minutes roll on, but offering numerous occasions to
laugh. Matt Nable as Boss spews
level-headed dialogue and strategic ideas to further the plot, and Dave
Bautista fills out all the adrenaline and sarcastic comments required. Vin Diesel plays the character, Riddick, as
only Vin Diesel can—badass mixed with a side of psychotic—and then there's
Katee Sackhoff.
Katee
Sackhoff had such a memorable role in Battlestar Galactica that her acting here
almost looks childish. Whether it’s from
bad directing, terrible dialogue, no love for the role, or just plain laziness…everything
she does, especially the over-acting facial expressions, will make you
cringe. But can you blame her? She happens to be the only female in the
story, whose part seems to be written by a teenage pervert. Let’s start first with her name: Dahl. Pronounced "doll" throughout the
film, taking viewers back to the 1930's when gangsters used the same pet name
for women. Then there are her lines,
which are unbelievably Oscar worthy.
Puking fantastic garbage like, "I
don't f--k guys," only makes her character that much more
extraordinary. And to top it off, Dahl
gets the cliché shower scene to help round out her uniqueness. Sackhoff seems to be an afterthought in the
film and that's just a waste of a perfectly good Sci-Fi actress.
"You're kidding right..."
"We are paying you, Ms. Sackhoff."
"Alright, but personally, I think that line sucks."
Now,
you're probably wondering, "So who's the best actor in the film?" Are you sitting down? It's the CG pet Riddick raises. The animated animal might not have the cutest
smile (think a rabid Doberman pinscher
had sex with a hyena), but the interactions with Diesel are some of the
film's best representations of humanity.
And when there's a turning point in the story for the pet, you'll feel
more sympathy for the CG dog, then for any other character.
END OF A
TRILOGY?
If
you’re looking for full resolve of Riddick's character—like finally settling
down, surrounded by a white picket fence with nasty other-world creatures
playing on the front lawn—then keep on looking.
The story here ties up its own loose ends before the credits roll, but
it looks like our anti-hero might have more tales up his sleeve.
"Fine, Mr. Diesel, you can keep the goggles and the plastic bone. Now will you please stop
sulking over there, and come back and shoot this scene."
CONCLUSION:
Riddick
keeps the esthetic and familiar feel of Pitch Black, but still manages to add a
tiny bit of appeal for fans of the series.
The story is simplistic with humorous tones, contains the perfect dingy
Sci-Fi atmosphere, and has Diesel, shining, as the Furyan convict. There's nothing more you need in a low-budget
Sci-Fi action film. Except maybe a good
female lead, or better dialogue, but hey you can't win them all…right?
2 1/2 out of 5 stars (minus two and a half stars for
repeated plot and wasted Sackhoff)
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