Video Games: The All-Digital Future

WARNING: the following article is lathered in extreme sarcasm and should be read with a continuous sly grin and sporadic maniacal laugh.  Enjoy.

When you come home from a long day, the first thing you need to do is shake off all the stupid you've accumulated from other human beings.  And the only way to do that is with pixelated adventuring.  So you grab two pounds of bacon, 360 ounces of soft drink (diet of course), a barrel of cheese balls, and then bury your ass in your favorite chair…but not before the arduous task of opening a video game case and slipping the disc inside your console.

After years of vanquishing evil, the holy warrior arrived at his hardest task yet: a boat with no oars.

After decades of leveling up you've realized something: the last thing you want to do is make life more complicated…and sitting down and preparing a video game has just become a hassle.  There must be some way to make the experience better.  Well, there is.  It's called the digital video game marketplace: where everything is made of pixelated lollipops and artificial rainbows.  Why should you have to waste fifteen seconds slipping a disc in your machine, when those precious seconds could be spent eating another cheese ball smothered in bacon?  Why should anyone have to go through the harrowing task of finding a spot for all those 1/2 inch wide disc cases?  And why should any gamer have to go outside *gulp* and hand money to another human being in exchange for goods?  Why?

None of those terrible situations should have to be completed by anyone, when all you have to do is push a button to purchase and download the newest game.  Now, let's not mention the extremely long amount of time it could take to download these games.  Depending on your Internet speed, you might be able to run to the store twice or even eat double the amount of cheese balls.  But that's just injecting logic where is doesn't belong.  The truth is: purchasing a digital video game is the Lord's work.  It is everything that is good in a world where people need their pleasures yesterday.  But before you go organizing town wide disc-burnings and declaring Blu-ray the devil, there are a few things about the inevitable All-Digital future you should probably know.

Gamers around the world reveled in The Witcher 3 storyline...right up until Geralt challenged 

a creature to a dance-off for a loaf of bread. 

OWNERSHIP:

If you don't know it by now, here's a reminder: you don't own anything you purchase digitally.  You're only purchasing a license to use the product.  But do you really need to own anything in this world, anyway?  No.  Life and everything in it is a pixelated illusion like the Matrix, a series of random zeroes and ones.  And you're satisfied knowing that a few colored pixels are yours to use right up until you're dead.  So who cares about bequeathing anything to your heirs?  Screw the family.  They've never really given you anything but love and affection.  And who needs that when you're trying to beat Diablo 3 in the hardest mode?

TRADE INS:

Digital collections are so easy to manage: when a hard drive is full all you have to do is delete a game and replace it with the next best thing.  A few years down the line you could always go back and replay your game and it didn't even collect any dust.  And with all the new games coming out every week, of course a few years from now you'll want to go back and replay that game that already has ten sequels.  Only silly people would take their old games that they haven't played in months or years and trade them in to get money for new ones.  You'd have to be seen in public anyway.  And going outside could be very detrimental to your health.  Have you ever tried crossing a street?

 

"Trust me, gents, aim for the nuts!  It's the only way!"

LENDING:

Nobody likes to share.  Everyone knows that.  "You want me to allow my friend to try a game for a day or week while I'm playing something new?  No way!"  Your games—er licenses—are yours and nobody will lay a finger on them ever again.  By having a digital collection, you will never have to share.  Of course the PS4 has that new share feature coming up, where you'll be able to hand over the controller (via the internet) for an hour so your friend can try out a game.  Dang.  And you'll have to be online and sit there while your friend has all the fun.  Dang, dang.  At least they won't have to be in your house like the old days.  Nobody enjoys having people in their living room, playing their games and eating their food.

"Well, we have to get down there somehow..."

"Alright, Hotshot, then you jump first, because hay from a few hundred feet is ridiculous 

and my stupid meter is completely filled."

PRICES:

So we've finally come to the real advantage to a digital future.  These old disc based ways cause games to still be priced at sixty bucks a pop with only a few hours of campaign.  And all your hard-earned money goes to the evil retail corporations instead of the developers.  But with an All-Digital future you won't have to worry about that anymore.  With digital pricing you can fully support your developers by giving more money directly to them, especially if they don't have to compete with brick and mortar store prices.  And currently with no overhead on digital games—no child labor plants making discs, no drivers being paid to ship them, no money going towards keeping the lights on in a store, and absolutely no money paying a cashier's salary—new AAA games are already much, much cheaper in the digital marketplace than their retail counterparts.  It's amazing that discs have lasted this long with their digital versions practically free compared to the retail versions.

You must also understand that sneaky retail stores have something called shelf space that only comes in a limited amount.  So at one point or another, these devil-stores have to sell their video games cheaper to make room for new games.  It's a fairly new idea called "the sale."  But you won't have to worry about that anymore with all games becoming digital in the future, and pixelated shelf space becoming infinite.  And since developers and publishers won't be competing with retail, they can set their game prices as low (Yay!) or as high (Boo!) as they see fit.  As an example, just look at all the perfectly priced mobile games in App stores.  There's not a single one more than 99 cents.  So don't fret…a developer or publisher would never charge more than what their video game is worth, especially with the cost of production going up every second.  You'll just be swimming in all the extra cash you'll be saving on brand-new digital video games.  It'll be gaming nirvana.  And you'll be a god.

"You like that, tough guy?  The king of stealth taught me this."

"Batman?"

"Batman's fictional you idiot.  It was Sam Fisher."

CONCLUSION:

Thank goodness an All-Digital future is inevitable, because the strenuous effort it takes to insert a gaming disc is corrupting society.  A decade from now, gamers will be showered in pixelated candy canes and animated fairy dust.  And with all those wonderful benefits listed above, only a fool would want an actual disc they can own and hold in their hands.

DVD Movie Review - Trust Me

Trust Me is the type of movie that would have easily garnered 5 out of 5 stars…and then the last ten minutes happens.

STORY:

Howard (writer and director Clark Gregg—A.K.A. Agent Coulson) is an ex-child star that becomes an agent.  He seems to be in the perfect position of his career with children giving him the middle finger, people hitting him with cars, and parents basically using him as a barista.  On the cusp of losing the next child star, Howard is found down and out by a lonely thirteen year old named Lydia (Saxon Sharbino).  Lydia's life hasn't been all sunshine and rainbows either, but Howard sees talent and his ticket to the big time hidden within her.  Will Howard be able to make her a star?  Grape throwing, back-stabbing, hysterical dialogue, and terrible CGI wings ensue.

"Listen, you work hard.  But look at the way you're drooping, and your leaves for God's sake...How am 

I supposed to promote you for the Jungle Book, if you don't take care of yourself?"

THOUGHTS:

Trust Me has the makings of a fantastic movie: a wonderful story; a humble, bumbling, yet lovable main character; unbelievable acting; and witty dialogue.  And then the ending occurs and you instantly lose the emotional connection you've spent over an hour building.  If nothing else, Trust Me demonstrates that Clark Gregg is excellent writer, fantastic actor, and extremely talented director.  So what does that mean?  It means there isn't one person—from the always exceptional Sam Rockwell to the newly discovered Saxon Sharbino—that gives a mediocre performance in the film.  Everyone goes above and beyond their abilities.  And if you haven't seen Gregg outside the Marvel universe, then you're missing out.  The man can act.  And having a great story idea with these brilliant actors should make for an exquisite film.  So what the hell happened?

Sometimes a writer has a vision for a story and after creating that vision, never really takes the time to determine if all the pieces work.  Sure, you'll see Trust Me's ending and then try to remember all the little hints you seemed to miss along the way (especially the humongous one in the first two minutes) while enjoying funny one-liners and witty dialogue.  But the question becomes: is keeping the theme worth the price at the end?  Even if the movie concluded the way you were hoping or expecting with no twists, it still would have been great.  But instead, Gregg ends the movie his way (which is admirable); essentially killing all character arcs and murdering the uplifting theme you thought the film had.  What can possibly be better than a story about a down-on-his-luck agent that might just get his chance to finally shine, whether in life or career?  Apparently, a story that ends with you depressed, aggravated and scratching your head.

"I'm sorry, hold that thought.  This dang thing in my ear has been picking up radio waves 

from Japan all day."

FOOLED YOU:

Just like last week's Fading Gigolo, Trust Me is categorized under comedy, but—again—that's just the packaging.  About an hour into the film the plot takes an unexpected tragic turn.  This plunges the film head first into a heavy drama, but the "expected ending" from this point, still would've kept the uplifting theme.  Except the last ten minutes adds an even more dramatic twist and everything is thrown out the window.  So if you're just looking for laughs from Trust Me, it's best to watch the first hour and then turn it off.

"Now you listen hear, pal, Spongebob is a great show and Sponge Out of Water will be an awesome 

movie...no matter how ridiculous it looks."

THE ACTING:

Hats off to Saxon Sharbino.  Her acting throughout the film is exceptional.  Not only does she fit easily alongside Gregg or Rockwell, but she also holds the entire film together.  It's really her story you become more engrossed in and if her acting slipped just a little, the whole movie would've went completely downhill.  This is casting at its finest.

Sam Rockwell graces the screen as Aldo, Howard's competition, and more importantly, the film's antagonist.  Now, if you know anything about Rockwell, you'll know that the man can act the crap out of any dick-ish character.  And this film is no exception.  The only problem is he's only in it for about ten minutes, but luckily, those ten minutes are stretched throughout the movie so you can enjoy his comedic greatness during all ninety minutes of film.

Clark Gregg is also fantastic in the movie.  He's able to evoke laughs one minute and then utter sadness another.  But his real triumph is directing all the other actors in the film.  Even Amanda Peet (who portrays Marcy, Howard's love interest), an actress mostly known for her pretty face and nakedness in The Whole Nine Yards, turns up the talent.  Paul Sparks stops by to play Ray, Lydia's drunken yet protective father.  And he'll make you hate him one moment and then feel for him the next.  Allison Janney spends her time as Meg, a woman that loves to give Howard a hard time.  And last but not least, Molly Shannon jumps in front of the camera as Janice, the mother of a child actor that enjoys screaming and hitting people with her car. 

"Hey, I'm just saying: whoever smelt it, dealt it."

CONCLUSION:

Trust Me storms out of the gate as a witty comedy, then it tickles the drama tree, and then it flies completely off the rails at the end.  If you're looking for tragic turns and twist endings coated in comedy, then Trust Me is your one stop shop.  With exceptional acting, witty dialogue, and an almost great story, Trust Me falls into the category of films that can only be watched once, due to the "what the f*ck" ending.  If you do happen to rent Trust Me, watch the first hour and twenty minutes and then shut it off and just imagine the rest.  It'll end up as a great movie in your mind and more importantly, it'll leave you feeling content.

4 out of 5 Stars (minus a star for the last ten minutes)

DVD Movie Review - Fading Gigolo

Fading Gigolo is a film written and directed by John Turturro, but it can easily be wedged into any Woody Allen collection.

STORY:

Fioravante (John Turturro) works only two days a week at a local flower shop in New York.  His friend Murray (Woody Allen) owns a bookstore that's about to close.  And between the two of them, they barely have a couple nickels to rub together.  So Murray, the opportunist, uses his rambling to accidentally start a new business.  See, Murray's dermatologist, Dr. Parker (Sharon Stone), wants to have a ménage a trois with her best friend, Selima (Sofia Vergara).  And they just can't seem to find the right man.  Murray jumps at the problem and tells Dr. Parker that he knows a guy.  So who’s the guy?  Well…the guy happens to be his not-so-good-looking friend Fioravante, who only knows how to fix a bouquet of flowers.  Soon after, Murray becomes the pimp that can afford expensive sofas and Fioravante becomes the whore with a heart.  Hasidic Jews, far-fetched plots, Woody rambling, book sniffing, and obnoxious hats ensue.

"Look...isn't she purdy with her wittle, wittle, lips, and her--"

"Please, shut up.  You're ruining the moment."

THOUGHTS:

A quick read of the above and you already know the premise behind the movie is ridiculous.  Could two women that look like Sharon Stone and Sofia Vergara actually have a problem finding a real man?  Then to add to the nuttiness, the real man turns out to be a Kramer look-a-like, named John Turturro.  Could anything like that happen in real life?  Probably not.  But it's the movies, so it's best to let the outlandish idea go and enjoy the story behind all the foolishness.  John Turturro as a ladies man?  Sure.  Woody Allen as his pimp?  Even better.  The quirkiness is what makes this movie special.  So if you can't get passed either of those two actors, then you might be better off watching the Amazing Spider-Man 2 add numerous villains and ruin a franchise.

Now, if you're thinking Fading Gigolo is nothing but a comedy, you'd be dead wrong.  It begins as a funny romp about two friends that are in over their head.  But halfway through, the film's true identity creeps in and you'll find yourself watching a love story which borrows the old cliché: you want what you can't have.  That's right.  If you thought Fading Gigolo is all goofiness and laughs, then you're definitely going to be caught off guard.  Sure, Woody Allen remains the film's funny side, but after Turturro's character meets Avigal (Vanessa Paradis) it turns into a love story with stolen glances and shy conversations.  Does this hurt the film?  No.  The acting still holds up and fortunately, Woody Allen is there to pop in whenever the film becomes too heavy handed in drama.

"I give you this flower, hoping you'll forgive me.  Those Transformer movies destroyed a beloved franchise 

and I vow to never be so reckless again."

THE ACTORS:

This film might be written, directed, and staring John Turturro, but Woody Allen steals the show…in every scene and with every line.  If you love Allen's ramblings and just shear goofiness, then you'll love Fading Gigolo.  You'll wonder whether the dialogue was actually written for Allen, or if Turturro just gave Woody free rein.  Either way, it works perfectly fine in the film.  The banter between the straight-laced Turturro and the eccentric Allen, is the film's bread and butter.  And Allen is thoroughly at home, running around as the kooky friend, saying whatever crazy crap comes into his head.

John Turturro at first won't seem to fit the roll as a ladies man, but after an hour in and multiple gorgeous women under his belt (which moves a little too fast for believability—but hey, it's Hollywood) you'll soon let his "unattractiveness" go and just enjoy the ride.  The slight problem comes when the humor is ditched and Woody isn't in the scene.  Even though Turturro can fill the drama and comedic aspect of the film, the character and movie can seem a little uneven going from silly to very serious in a matter of minutes.  But thankfully Woody is always there to pull the unevenness back together.

"Sofia, darling, take it easy with the makeup.  You remember what happened last time?  People

kept calling you Greta from Gremlins 2."

The film also stars Vanessa Paradis as Avigal, a lonely widow Hasidic Jew.  She's the drama part of the film and also showcases some of the best acting the movie has to offer.  She's also the only casting that actually looks the role.  Speaking of casting, Liev Schreiber—the mountain disguised as a man—plays another Hasidic Jew in the neighborhood that may or may not be falling for Avigal.  Not only does Schreiber's acting lack the seriousness for the role, but he also sticks out like a sore thumb in the film.  Every time he pops on screen, it instantly feels like he should be penalized for cross-checking or be beating someone to death for bad-mouthing his family.  Sharon Stone struts around as an aging horny toad with the only nude scene in the film (naturally).  Sofia Vergara happens to be just as voluptuous and annoying as in any other role.  And Aida Turturro (The Sopranos) steps in front of the camera just long enough to get into an accident and acquire a free lunch.

"Sir, can you please--"

Cut...Dammit!  Can someone please dig a hole in the street and put Sabretooth in it?  This shot 

is way too lopsided.

CONCLUSION:

Fading Gigolo may appear as a comedy, but it's truly a love story wrapped in comedic paper.  The film may fall heavily into the drama plot towards the end, but luckily Woody Allen is there to pull it back on track with his mumbling one-liners.  If you have a tough time stomaching love stories, Turturro or Allen, then it's best to stay away.  If you're a dude watching the film, hoping for a Sofia Vergara nude scene, then keep on hoping.  Her love making, apparently, is done fully draped in lingerie.  Now, if you don't know what a gigolo is and you're watching the film for a definition, then Allen says it the best: Gigolo is in the music business.  There's the music, the lyrics, and then the gigolo.

3.5 out of 5 Stars (minus a star for the slight unevenness and half a star for the Schreiber miscast)

P&P's 5 Worthy Reads

"Yes, Hi...Hello, can you please point me toward the graphic novel section?"

For the past week, P&P has been on vacation.  What does that mean?  It means no amount of movie watching, video game playing, researching, or writing has taken place whatsoever.  But that's not to say there isn't time for a smidgen of reading.  Sure, there may be moments where the kids are running circles around you with pool noodles, whacking each other and occasionally cracking you upside the head, but that doesn't mean you don't have at least three or four minutes of quiet time to yourself…you know, to shower, eat, sleep, crap, and read.

The following recommended novels may (or may not have been pulled out of my ass, because—hey I’m on vacation) not be the greatest stories of all time, or classics, or even the best books ever written by famous authors, but they are novels I wouldn't hesitate to share with anyone interested in a specific genre.  So without further ado—and with minimum effort—here are five books you shouldn't pass up, listed in no particular order.

THE CRIME/THRILLER GENRE:

The Pawn by Steven James

The Pawn introduces readers to Patrick Bowers.  Bowers is a FBI agent that catches serial killers in an unusual manner that most of his colleagues don't approve of.  He throws away the idea of motives and uses patterns to catch his man.  This book is not only a fantastic crime story, but it also has one of the most unbelievable opening chapters you'll ever read (just read the first few pages and see for yourself).  No one in the writing industry today can match the way James weaves a tale.  If you're looking for a thriller about serial killers and a man struggling to keep a family together, the Patrick Bowers series is perfect.

THE HISTORIC/THRILLER/FANTASY GENRE:

The Cabinet of Curiosities by Douglas Preston & Lincoln Child

Preston & Child have a magical way of mixing historical fact with a hint of fantastical elements that no other authors can.  In this thriller, Special Agent Pendergast and an archaeologist named Nora Kelly begin to uncover the mysteries surrounding a whacked-out doctor that experimented on people a hundred years ago.  In the middle of finding clues, a serial killer with a very unusual method, begins to strike in Manhattan.  Is there a correlation between the two?  Looks like you’ll have to read it to find out.  But that’s okay, because this book has it all: New York history, nutty antagonists, the awesome Pendergast, excellent writing, and a tale that will get your heart racing.  If you haven't read any Preston & Child, this is where you should start.

THE SCI-FI GENRE:

Wool by Hugh Howey

Sure there are wonderful Sci-Fi classics that should be read whenever someone has the chance, but Wool instantly became a classic by hooking readers with something different.  In a futuristic world, where people are stuck living inside giant cylinders known as Silos, Juliette, a lonely mechanic is tasked with becoming the next Sheriff.  Howey has a knack for writing slow-boiling tales that grab you in the very beginning and string you along until the last page.  Wool is a fantastic character study.  If you're craving Sci-Fi, then Wool will keep you warm.  It's also a trilogy, so if you like Wool, then don't be afraid to jump into the other two books.

THE GAMER/SCI-FI GENRE:

Ready Player One by Ernest Cline (P&P review here)

In the future, Wade Watts is a teenager that spends his time jacked into a virtual reality world known as Oasis.  When the creator of Oasis dies, he embeds hidden puzzles—Easter eggs—within the system that only a person with the love and obsession for 1980's pop culture can unravel.  With the promise of fame and fortune to whoever discovers Oasis' secrets, Wade sets out to claim the prize and beat the game.  Cline creates an unbelievable world where any Gamer would be happy spending their time.  Be ready for movies, games, TV shows, commercials, and anything else to do with the 80's.  Ready Player One is also a wonderful coming-of-age story that grips you from start to finish.  If you're a Gamer that doesn't like to read, this book may change your thinking entirely.

THE HUMOR GENRE:

A whopping tie between:

Apathy and Other Small Victories by Paul Neilan (P&P review here) and

A Dirty Job by Christopher Moore (P&P review here)

Both books are over-the-top hilarious.  If you're feeling like a book with slacker/office type humor, then jump into Apathy.  It’s about Shane, a man-child that cares for absolutely nothing, but seems to always fall into crap that's over his head.  This book can be read over and over again, and will still make your sides hurt from laughing.  It's silly and goofy and shocking and pulls no punches when poking fun at anyone or anything.

If you're looking for humor with a side of fantasy, then A Dirty Job has you covered.  Charlie Asher is a Beta Male that owns a second-hand store and leads a boring life.  That is until his daughter Sofie is born and people start dying all around him.  Then he starts seeing creatures and hearing filthy language coming from San Francisco's sewers.  Could Charlie Asher, a man who seems to just barely get by, be Death?  You know, the same Death that collects people’s souls when they die.  Well, you'll have to read it to find out.  A Dirty Job is one of Moore's best novels and great place to start reading his work.

THE READING WRAP-UP:

If there is one book on this list you haven't read and enjoy the genre being represented, then pick it up for your next vacation.  This list is nowhere near the five (six really) best novels ever written, but they are definitely ones that shouldn't be missed.  P&P will return next week in all its silly glory with more nonsense, more humor, and more reviews.

Destiny Beta - The Good, The Bad, and The Indifferent

NOTE:

The following is based on the Beta form of Destiny.  Any or all of these thoughts and concerns may have already been fixed or could be in the process of being tweaked for the full game release.

Weeks after Destiny's Alpha (P&P’s Destiny Alpha Impressions can be found here) brought joy to the hearts of many gamers, Bungie unleashed to the world the Beta, opening up the game to many more joystick-fondlers from both Playstation and the second-guesser Xbox.

The Beta began earlier for Playstation lovers on July 17^th, and in gaming news, will be a day no PSN user will forget.  Along with the added benefit of being able to play the game early, Playstation users were also granted a broken Bungie site, where no Codes could be accessed; and a busted PSN due to heavy traffic, where no Beta could be downloaded.  But the highlight of the event was delivered on Twitter where fellow gamers everywhere berated both Playstation and Bungie for the bang-up job of ruining their day.  Did this put a sour taste in gamer mouths early in the Beta?  Sure.  Is this whopping foul-up a taste of what's to come in September?  Hopefully not.  But in the meantime, let's explore what the Beta had to offer to Alpha survivors…once it finally was accessible.

"Do you really think I can do it, Speaker?"

"Make it to the bathroom?  Shouldn't be too difficult."

THE GOOD:

The Alpha had players dropped into Destiny with no job, nowhere to live, and most of all…barely any backstory.  Just a gun and a direction.  But the Beta changed all that.  This time around you were woken up from a beautiful slumber in a filthy car resting in a burned-out world.  Then…you were given a gun and a direction.  The light story element introduced in the opening of the Destiny Beta will be the same in the full game's release come September 9th.  But did it make that much of a difference?  Again, just like the in Alpha, most of your time in Destiny will still be spent in Multiplayer, leaving the story in the wake of PvP kills.  One can only hope in the full release that there's somewhat of an interesting plot to keep gamers enthused and playing.

On Saturday the 26th for two hours, Bungie wanted to stress test the servers, and in that allotted time, they opened up a new mission on the Moon.  While it did give gamers an opportunity for different locale exploration, there were no new enemies or new weapons.  The moon mission could have been breezed through in under ten minutes, but exploring every outhouse, henhouse, cave, and structure took closer to a half hour.  In the end, the mission was at least a new exciting place to shoot the same enemies.

Multiplayer also saw some changes.  Control on the Old Russia map was replaced by Venus' shores of time.  And in special cases, for only a few hours at a time, another area in the Crucible opened up called the Iron Banner where gamers squared-off on Mars.  The Iron Banner is where player levels and upgrades mean life or death for Guardian hopefuls, leaving any combatants that were not maxed-out, respawning most of the time.  But again, the Mars multiplayer map did provide a new backdrop for getting shot-gunned in the face.

"Well, Ghost...I found it.  But how the f*ck am I supposed to get it down?"

THE BAD:

The missions, strikes, and events were all practically the same from the Alpha.  If there was a difference, it was minimal since everything—once again—was accomplished in good Old Russia.  Now, in the Alpha, not one login problem or error occurred—probably due to lower player volume—but in the Beta there were quite a few times when problems occurred trying to connect with Bungie servers.  On top of that, once you were logged in, there was no telling if you would stay, as an error possibility could pull you right out of the game.  And if Twitter is to be believed, many Xbox players had trouble with match-making in multiplayer and also arrived at desolate Towers to point and wave at no one.

The strikes had gamers dropping out left and right.  Whether it was from them losing connection to the Bungie servers or just being crybabies is anyone's guess, but it did hinder some of the fun.  If you were in the middle of a strike that required a three-man team and a member suddenly disappeared, the rest of the team was left hanging.  In the Alpha, when a player dropped out for any reason, another was replaced seamlessly without a problem.  But not in the Beta.  You had to soldier on, ruining a perfectly good three-man dance off at mission end.

Gamer drop-out didn't only extend to strikes though, multiplayer also felt an impact.  Since Control was the only option—yet again—teams in the beginning would be an even matched six vs. six.  But have a guardian get killed once or twice early on and decide to leave, and the team was then left a man short and Destiny never replaced them.  But it didn't stop with one.  Exceeding expectations, Destiny allowed any amount of your team to leave in the middle of a match and never refilled the tank.  There were games that ended up six vs. two by the end.  Bungie needs to implement either a penalty or replacement system for drop-outs.  If not, you'd better gather five of your best friends on your fire-team that way you know no one is leaving until the end.

"Let's find you a new voice, Ghost.  Maybe one of the female persuasion.  Because--no offense--you're just 

not exciting enough for me...I need pizazz and I need it now." 

THE INDIFFERENT:

Since the complaints from the Alpha, Dinklage has had his voice work synthesized to almost unrecognizable levels, even sparking Bungie to remove the "that wizard came from the moon" line.  Some people say it's a lot better, but really…you can polish a turd as much as you want, but in the end, it's still a turd.  Now, Dinklage's voice acting isn't that bad—it's more flat than anything—but sending it through a thousand different programs, still won't give it life. 

Alpha survivors hoped and dreamed that the Beta would have a higher level cap for your character, bringing additional guns, upgrades, accessories, and dance moves.  Many gamers were left disappointed to discover the level cap was still held tight at eight.  So again you obtained the same guns and only went as far as the Alpha.  The other request Alpha survivors wanted were more areas to explore, but the moon mission ended up being the only addition in the Beta.  Which begs the question: Could Destiny be smaller in scope and story than Bungie has led its audience to believe?  With one major area to explore per planet, there's a chance Destiny's story could be beaten in just a few hours.  But this is primarily a multiplayer game, so those looking for a deep story might be better off looking elsewhere.

Other multiplayer game types not shown include: 

Rock, Paper, Scissors; Pick-A-Number; Flip-A-Coin; and Guess Which Hand

BETA CONCLUSION:

The bottom line: Destiny is still a lot of fun at its core.  Were Alpha survivors hoping for a bit more this time around?  Yep.  Did they get it?  Nope.  Did it make a difference?  Only to some.  Most gamers still found the multiplayer exciting even though they were only privy to a few different maps and the same Control game type.  Even though the Beta started with a little more story this time around, it’s the multiplayer and Raids that will keep gamers returning.  Does Bungie have a few aces up its sleeve come release time?  No way to tell.  The only thing gamers can do is try to fill the Destiny void during August and wait for the full version to blow their minds…or maybe not.  Here's hoping for the best.